i really didn’t have too much to say about this while watching it but as time’s gone on i literally cannot stop thinking about it. i think i’m just in love with the concept and the potential. i keep thinking about what could have been. we all love religious vampire imagery so obviously this had moments that were beyond satisfying, but why did they have to be so few and far between? still, clearly i’m hung up on this so let me try to boil it down to some points. • the old people makeup. i already tweeted about this but god damn whose idea was that. it ruined any later reveals about what the vampire blood does almost immediately. besides that it looked horrendous and for all that the prosthetics people are very talented, it never plays well in a serious setting. just hire old actors!!! i promise we will still get the idea!!! • the monologuing. it was bad on hill house but by god…..this man needs to stick to movies where a strict runtime will hold him back. have some restraint you absolute narcissist. the 10 second skip button on netflix, you’re my best friend and i couldn’t have done this without you. • NOT GAY ENOUGH. self explanatory. • the sheriff (the best character) felt insanely underutilized? it was incredibly frustrating to watch racist interaction after racist interaction, only for the final episode to go down like that for him. this show felt like an exercise in getting the viewer heated over things but then holding back from providing any kind of satisfying resolution or revenge. by the end i was kind of confused by his inclusion in the show at all, other than to provide a punching bag to display how awful beverly was. while i appreciate everything we got with him, it just wasn’t enough. • speaking of beverly…….hell is empty and the devil walks the earth. i don’t even want to think about her. the actress is incredibly talented and credit where it’s due, she made for an insanely effective villain, but this is not what i want lmao. i don’t always need to root for the villain or see their side (altho that is always fun), but i DO need them to be funny and/or sexy. she made me want to spontaneously combust. moving on. • this is less important but also i thought riley’s storyline was a bit weird/pointless as well lol. i get that it was an ensemble, and i wasn’t even particularly attached to him, but it was only after that rowboat fire that i realised he was sort of the main character? the show began with him but then didn’t end with him. right when he was actually getting interesting as well. • finally, i’ll give them a positive: the vampire concept was everything. so good and well done. the eyeshine. the voice mimicry. no fangs. less human and more animal. the look of the angel overall. the verses cited to imply that vampires are biblical (and that concept overall) have been done before, but i enjoyed that too. that’s the whole pull of the show for me really and it should’ve been way more fleshed out. if you were to edit out all the negatives above you’d probably have a pretty fun short movie! and by god i wish it’d just been that instead. stop this man from making tv shows. ENOUGH!